Today I'm excited to introduce you to my friend, Sarah Von! She's an inspiring lady who blogs at Yes and Yes, about embracing the things that get your heart racing and living a life that works for you. She lives with an adventurous heart and amazing sense of humour, and I know you'll love discovering her & her encouragement to live your best life! – xo, k.
You know how we've all had those roller coaster years? Where there were ups, there were downs, my gum fell out of my mouth, got stuck in my hair and I made a weird face when we went by that camera? And while I really, really try to rise to the occasion in tough situations, there are plenty of times when my coping technique goes something like this:
1) Freak the eff out
2) Say things like “Eff me? Double Eff you!”
3) Kick the dead horse
4) Poke the dead horse with a stick
5) Kick the dead horse some more
6) Eat carbs and cheese in all their varying and delicious forms
But after all that fussing and cheese-eating, I'm usually left bloated and disappointed in myself. Once I calm down, I try to use one of my favorite psychological tricks:
What would Best Case Scenario Me Do?
(Or WWBCSMD if you want a super catchy acronym.)
Who's Best Case Scenario Me? She's the version of me when I'm in top form, firing on all cylinders, making choices that I'm proud of. She doesn't put up with that hot but shitty British boytoy, she doesn't lay on the couch shaking Bacos into her mouth on a Friday night and she doesn't sit idly by when people sprinkle their conversations with the word ‘retard.' She's who I am on occasion, and would like to be more often.
I really like this strategy. Instead of wondering how my mum/Madonna/Virgina Woolf would with deal with something, I try to think of a reaction that within my own lexicon. Sometimes it's helpful to think about how people we admire would handle things, yes. But I think that can also take the focus away from the unique strategies that we surely have inside ourselves.
And any given situation can be dealt with any number of ways. What would Oprah do if she was moved by the plight of stray dogs come winter? Probably adopt the whole pound and give each dog a gold dog mansion. BCSM would volunteer at the pound … and knit tiny dog sweaters. If some Lothario harassed Madonna on the street, she'd probably wring his neck with her giant biceps. BCSM would narrow her eyes, sigh and say “Don't do that, buddy.” I'll never be able to channel these amazing women that I am not, but I can channel the me that I someday hope to be.
This mind game is also helpful because it forces me to think about the person I want to become and distance between her and who I am now. BCSM is a bit more active, a lot more patient, procrastinates less, is more tolerant in some areas of her life … and less tolerant in others. But she's not so far from Sarah Von version 1.0. This gives me hope that I can get there someday and also reassures me that the version of myself that I am now isn't too bad.
What is your Best Case Scenario Me like?
LAST UPDATED ON: November 2nd, 2011
CATEGORY: All Posts
This is beyond awesome. :) Off to check out her blog!
hahahaha i love this! thank you!
You are too cute! I am cracking up at the thought of what Virginia Woolf might do on one of our rough days. Thanks for inspiring post :)
What an inspiring post! The coping technique that includes kicking a dead horse sounds a little too familiar. :) Thanks for sharing this guest post, I am off to check out her blog!
I love this post. Off to check out more of her posts. I have a feeling i’ll be adding her to my reader very quickly.
LOVE! Adding her to my reader & probably writing a little journal about who BCSM is. Thanks for sharing Kyla!
“This gives me hope that I can get there someday and also reassures me that the version of myself that I am now isn’t too bad.”
SO enjoyed reading this! What a great post. Thank you Kyla for hosting and Sarah for sharing!
BCSM does not procrastinate as well! This is a fab idea. I need to put it into motion, or my head!
Yay! I love Sarah Von’s blog! :)
Bravo Sarah! Words we all need to here. Thank you.
This is awesome. Thank you!!! I am going to sit down right now and work out what Best Case Scenario Me would do. Best case scenario me certainly wouldn’t sleep until 12 and stress about things as much as “me at the moment’ is.
I think we would all be much happier people if we learned to define success through our best selves, rather than everyone else. I need to listen to my best self much more often.
Yes! Totally agree… and will definitely be keeping this in mind everytime I get down-in-the-dumps, eat-lots-of-carbs type of feel sorry for myself.
*your Ah!
Thanks so much for hosting me, Kyla! You’re readers are every bit as awesome as *you* are! :)
I lovelovelove Sarah & her blog & this post.
What a wonderful thought. Sometimes I do a version of this which is like “What Would Not-So-Crazy Me Do?” Either way, it’s been the go-to tactic mostly in my relationships, because that’s where it is so important to be YOU & not someone else.
I want to make a sign or cross-stich this & frame it somewhere. ;)
This is SO lovely. Thanks for the intro, Kyla! Sarah’s definitely going on my must reads list.
This is brilliant! I love this and it’s something I’ve never really thought about before. I’m definitely going to try the BCSM more often when in a crisis or tough situation. Thanks! :)
Sarah, you are always so inspirational! Kyla, thanks for hosting this awesome post. (ps- my Best Case Scenario Me puts on lotion at least three times a day to avoid cracked cuticles, let’s people go ahead of her in the supermarket line, and never EVER forgets a birthday.)
I LOVE this post – and I’m adding Sarah’s blog to my reader – stat!
I’ve found myself not taking the time for things lately. For instance, I really want to talk to people (my co-workers, friends) about how important it is to vote in our local election next Tuesday (I won’t be here, so I voted by absentee ballot), but I know it’s going to be a few minutes to do that and I haven’t taken the time to do that. Thanks for inspiring me to!