Sesame Kale Salad by fresh 365

I’ve written a lot about food here- I adore cooking and baking and often share my veg friendly recipes, I’ve talked about growing up vegetarian & how my husband isn’t vegetarian, I’ve done a 30 Day Vegan experiment and talked about how you can plan a vegetarian or vegan challenge that you can stick with, and shared how I meal plan.

My problem is with consistency- after a couple of weeks I stop making being active and eating well a priority and I backslide. While I love eating healthy food & being active, I don’t consistently set aside time to prepare great healthy at home or to work out. Well, I’ve turned a corner lately, and wanted to share some of the things that have been working for me!

What I’ve been learning & loving about getting healthier:

- I’ll stick with working out daily when there’s a built in reward- beyond endorphins! When I’ve tried to make working out part of my daily routine in the past, it’s just been an item on my check list but for the past month I’ve been making it the highlight of my morning by bringing my iPad with me and watching episodes of TV shows I’m enjoying and reading blogs. It’s meant that I don’t comment on my favourite blogs as much, but it’s getting me working out so I think it’s a fair trade off.

- It’s easier to eat well if I focus on cooking more than on eating. When I’m focused on eating I spend time making sure that I don’t have things that are bad for me, which means my head is in a place of avoiding & self restraint. Not very exciting! When I focus on cooking great food for myself  and making time for that, I get to be focused on creating and possibility which is much more natural and is something I can look forward to every day.

- I’m more likely to stick with planning meals around eating simple, whole foods instead of around recipes I find online. Trying new recipes is a lot of fun, but because I’m trying to change how I eat & think about food, thinking about vegetables that I want to eat and finding simple ways to prepare them is much more sustainable from day to day.

Other changes that I’ve made over the past month include making sure I eat green, leafy veggies and fruits every day, getting at least 30 mins of cardio daily, giving up coffee & espresso in favor of green tea, reducing the sugar I take in, avoiding foods that are overly carby or starchy, and sticking exclusively with whole grains. The funny thing is that these are ideas that my marathon running, everything organic & vegetarian mom raised my sister and I with but I’m starting to see the value much more now than I did when I was younger.

I’m hoping that by adding daily work outs and overall healthier eating into my life that I can permanently lose some of the weight I’ve gained in the past two years, and that I can figure out a way to manage (or skip!) the energy dips & spikes I have during the day. I can dream, right? :)

Green beans with lemon & feta cheese by Two Peas & Their Pod 

The other day on twitter, I asked what your favourite vegetarian friendly resources were and I got some amazing responses that I couldn’t pass up sharing here. And for the record, I follow all of these lovely ladies and you should too!

Reader Recipe Resources

Do you have Veganomicon??
@Hello_Vanny

Sophie Dahl does lots of veggie recipes, and she has two books out [KR: one & two] and an adorable kitchen. :) xx
@LittleMessyLA

I love VeganDad, great recipes, lots of variety and Canadian win/win/win.
@BuildingBeauty_

The latest whole living magazine has a huge recipe section on raw and vegan eating. Can’t wait to try! And I just made My New Roots chocolate shake. Amazing!
@ourcitylights

Any book by Sarah Kramer and of course isa chandra moskiwitz and blogs vegan stoner, your vegan mom & vegan breakfast. And if you go to findingvegan.com you can search recipes and it takes you to their blogs that how I find all mine
@misslarissabree

I think you know mine! @ohsheglows [blog] and @Mama_Pea ‘s [blog] sites are my fave :)?
@Lisasyarns

Anything by Isa Chandra Moskowitz is amazing. I love the recipes in Vegan with a Vengeance!
@Tiny_Nest

Not sure if anyone recommended her or not but the ‘urban housewife‘ has some great recipes. Also your ‘vegan mom‘ :)
@OreoFairy

Have you ever read @EatingBirdFood blog? [link!] She’s my favorite!
@McCatie

Check out @backtoherroots she has an amazing recipe for Mexican lentil stuffed shells
@threadedbyHL

I love browsing through TasteSpotting.com for recipe ideas!
@KWillll

hipsterfood.tumblr.com / chickpea-magazine.tumblr.com :D
@sewindie

I’ve been having so much fun exploring these resources and adding them to my “Fude” folder where I do all my recipe research, and I hope that they’re useful to you too! I would love to hear about any resources that you swear by, or tips for going from healthy choices to a healthy lifestyle.

I used to have stretched ears, but when Jesse and I got engaged I decided to take them out to see if they’d grow in enough for me to wear normal earrings. It’s been a long time, and my ears are definitely never going to grow in- so this year I decided that if that was going to be the case, then I wanted to stretch up and get really cute, really big plugs!

These are the plugs that I’ve been wearing while I’ve been stretching up since last fall…

Right now I’m wearing the large tunnels, and I’m so excited to be able to wear my next goal plugs – hopefully next month!

They’re so sparkly and beautiful, they look like a night sky! Two weeks I really hurt my ears by trying to stretch to quickly, so I’m taking it slow for the next little while and I’m dreaming of the day I can get them in :)

This weekend I made my first trip to the big farmers market in our city. Last year I made buying local, early on Saturday mornings (followed up by an afternoon nap) into a summer ritual- I would roll out of bed, put on a hat, grab coffee and wake up on the way to the market while Jesse drove.

I’ve been excited to make that part of my summer again this year and while a big part of me loves sleeping in on Saturday morning (so luxurious!) there’s nothing that will get me out of bed like the prospect of patting goats on the head while buying some incredible cheese. The market is packed by 9:30 am and fiddle music is carried thought the crowd by the din of hundreds of conversations going on at once, in a Manitoba mix of French, English and low German, for good measure.

This time out I remembered my market bags, and came home with them packed full of fresh bread, kale, spinach, strawberries, beautiful tiny carrots and some of the most tender and skinny asparagus stalks I’ve ever looked forward to eating. Wandering around all the amazing food got me excited about planning some decadent meals this week. In the past weeks I’ve let meal planning slide and it has resulted in dinners that have left a lot to be desired. Which is code for eating pizza at 10:30 pm. Now I have spaghetti with lemon and olive oil, a blue cheese and potato tart, and leek bruschetta to look forward to- I can’t wait!

Walking around the market was one of the first ‘crowd’ experiences I’ve had this summer, and I’m getting used to the new attention that my three quarter sleeve draws. I think that I’m finally starting to understand what people mean by how Canadians are polite- while I notice people staring while I’m not looking at them, the moment I turn they look away! It’s an endearing trait that makes me smile. I’ve been asked about my tattoos a few times, but in a very sweet way and many times it’s by tattooed people.

Mostly I’m aware that I stand out much more than I did last year and I’m still getting used to the feeling of being “that tattooed girl”- but I love the art and I feel much so more confident, positive and like myself. I don’t know if it’s being a little older, that I enjoy fresh veggies a little too much, or that I’m just getting used to standing out from the crowd, but whatever it is? I’m in love.

ps – Happy Canada Day + 4th of July, I hope you’ve had a restful long weekend! And as always, if you’d like to see these photos in detail visit them on my flickr stream

At the end of last summer I decided to end having my pixie cut with a cut I called my “fauxmpadour”- super short on the sides and longer on the top. Since then I’ve been growing out my hair without a specific goal in mind, beyond that I wanted something longer, lower maintenance and less expensive. Holy hair cuts, short hair is a bit exhausting!

Since we’re officially out of toque weather I’ve had to bring my hair out of hiding, and it’s looking like by the end of summer I’m going to be in the neighbourhood of my first goal cut for the longer short hair styles I’ve been loving! I’ve been asked a lot of questions about how long it takes to grow out a pixie cut, so I thought it would be fun to show you a timeline from November (when the sides of my hair was cut right to my head) to the end of May, where I now have over three inches on the sides and my top layer is finally reaching my ears! Progress!

Growing out my hair has been… boring! At one point I half considered buying clip on bang extensions to use as short hair extensions until Liz reminded me that desperate times just call for more hats. Thank goodness for twitter!

I love changing my hair constantly and growing it out requires patience that doesn’t come easily to me. With my pixie cut I feel like I know what works for me, and with longer hair I’m definitely out of my comfort zone- but I’m excited to have shoulder length hair and find a way to make it perfectly me.

I’m going to try for the bottom left cut first, then the one on the right when my layers are long enough, and then I’d love to add in some crazy colours! And in the mean time I’m trying to be all hair bands and positive thinking.

What’s the longest time you’ve gone growing out your hair?

I think I’ve become addicted to chopping mine off- it’s a terrible habit to break!

{images: purple bob from UK Hairdressers, blunt bob from  UK Hairdressers, bob + floral dress found at unknown source}

I usually have a hard time staying committed to healthy living, and since last summer it’s been a big challenge for me. The problem that I run into is that if I don’t meal plan every week I revert to making what’s easiest- and because I’m vegetarian, easy is usually code for carb heavy food.

Pasta and potatoes. It’s a problem.

Now that the summer is right around the corner and being outside is fun again I’ve been re-committing myself to being more active, and to learn some healthy habits that will stay with me for good. Just to make sure it works I have a two part plan!

Part One: Fall in Love with Working Out. Or Develop Stockholm Syndrome.

I want to get in shape for the summer, and then maintain it! To get there I have a new workout schedule that’s going to help me have more energy and drop my winter weight by running and doing weights during the week. Since I have a hard time making being active part of my routine, my only goal at the start is to do something active everyday until it becomes a natural habit instead of something I can talk myself in and out of.

Part Two: Plan So I Don’t Become a Carbetarian

I’m doubling my commitment to change how I eat. Since Jesse isn’t a vegetarian and I am, that means that more of our meals are going to be made together but separate (you can read about our split kitchen here) but it’s going to be better for both of us instead of being lazy about what we eat and focusing on our common foodie ground. I’m also working on being about 90% vegan, so I’ve been searching out new recipes for snacks and small meals of energy dense foods all day. My goal is that I don’t ever want to be starving when I sit down to a meal, and I always want the food I eat to be super nutritious- which I’m hoping will stopping the energy peaks and crashes that I’ve experienced until now.

Meal planning is hard for me to tackle when I’m out of practice, so this week I went back to basics with research and a simple meal planning techniques. I hopped onto a site that my friends Amber and Lisa love called Oh She Glows, to find some tasty vegan recipes I could base my week around.

How I Meal Plan

To plan, I write out the days of the week with spaces for meals and snacks, and on the other half of the paper I’ll write out some grocery categories. As I browse through recipes I write in what looks tasty under the meals for the week, and add in the leftovers for snacks or as sides for the next day’s meals. Then I bookmark the recipe and write out any ingredients I’m missing on the grocery half of the page, along with any staples we’re out of .

After about 15 mins I have a meal plan and I’m ready to go grocery shopping! There’s something about making a plan and taking charge that makes me feel so much more confident about being able to follow through. The thing that I’ve found helps the most is working with my flaws.  I know I’m always going to tend towards what’s most convenient, so when I already have a plan being healthy and following it is more convenient than trying to plan something at the last minute!

The tastiest part of this experiment so far is the Fruit and Nut Energy bites. They’re my default snack all week and they taste like candy! If you’re looking for a healthy and delicious snack I can’t recommend these enough- they’re easy to make and incredibly tasty. Plus if you eat Vegan for long enough? As I’ve long suspected, and explained in the first minutes of this scene from the movie Scott Pilgrim, you get superpowers.

What superpower you would give up meat and dairy for?
I used to think I would only become vegan if I could levitate, but since I’ve been eating vegan a lot and it’s not as hard as I thought I’d also be open to considering it if I gained the ability to stop time :)

Remember that time in September when I pierced the other side of my nose, vowed to show it to you, and then promptly forgot about it? I was taking some updated self portraits and remembered that if I was going to show you the blue streak in my hair I should show you my September piercing first!

Since the summer I feel like I’m back to the Geek Chic version of myself- I got my new crystal glasses, got the other side of my nose pierced, and went back to having gauged ears instead of trying to let them grow in.

Reality Check to Kyla: If your ears haven’t grown in after three years, it’s not going to happen!

After years of having no earrings to wear that will actually fit I’m happy to be able to wear earrings again! Here’s the new nose…

At first it took a little time to get used to the geeky Kyla who peered out of mirrors and windows at me, but I’m feeling really cute, positive, and like myself! I think a big part of it is that my anxiety has almost completely evaporated since October. I’ve been sticking to my plan of medication and tips from cognitive behavioural therapy to un-learn being anxious, and I’m feeling amazing :)

I still feel happy or sad when life happens- but I can deal with everything that comes my way, and I never feel paralyzed by my feelings any more. It’s so fun to go through the days without being worried, stressed, and tired all the time- everything is easier!

Tomorrow is my big tattoo day – I’m having the outline done to make my shoulder piece into a sleeve – and I’m excited to tackle it with my calm outlook! I had a massage yesterday  so I’m all loose and ready- and I’m feeling really excited and ready to sit still and make it happen. Send me deep breaths & good vibes tomorrow!

This weekend I had an idea- I wanted to bleach my hair out and then dye it back to brunette. I was trying to damage my hair a little, to give it more texture and make it easier to style, and after the bleaching I decided to leave a section blonde so I could dye it fun & crazy colours if I wanted to! I bleached it on Saturday morning and had tangerine blonde anime hair all weekend. I’ve always been a brunette so it was a lot of fun to see what I’d look like with lighter hair!

I’m back to brunette already and I’m happy to be out of the orange. The highlight of the weekend was when my mom stopped by to say hello, and I pretended that my orange hair was my new style- just in time for her wedding next weekend! She didn’t even miss a beat, and put on that “I love you no matter what” face that mom’s have…. until I started laughing :)

Do you like box dye or have you had one scary hair experience too many?

I love it because it lets me change my hair whenever I like! Though I never go too crazy… usually :)

Tomorrow’s the day that I’m going for my consultation with my tattoo artist about building onto the cherry blossom tattoo that I started this year. I’m so excited to hear his ideas when I give him my photo references, and to start dreaming about what this is going to look like when it’s finished. I loved sharing my photo references before my shoulder piece was started last spring so you guys could follow the process from beginning to end, so I’m going to keep it up while I work on two three quarter sleeves over the next year and a half…

The concept is that I’m building onto my existing cherry blossoms, so my  my left arm will be cherry blossoms and birds perched in the branches, representing elements in my life that ground me. These are the birds I’ve chosen…

And each of the birds is going to be holding onto small ribbons in the colours of the birthstones of each of my family members And a ribbon will be woven through the piece, tying all of the parts of my history and future together in a bow. I love the way my artist does birds in a really gorgeous hyper real style, and I can’t wait to see the stencil next month :)

As soon as I hit high school, I cut my hair. It was too thick and too long, and I wanted something cool and low maintenance. I grew my hair out long (very long) for the wedding so I could have an up-do and then immediately cut it again. The last chop decided it – I’m a short haired girl at heart.

That being said, in the past few years I’ve learned a little more than I would like to about working with my own & about the monthly cuts that come with maintaining it:

1. Never – ever – use the P word around someone with scissors if you don’t want exactly that. P is for Pixie Cut, and if you say that word a well meaning friend of a friend may give you a quarter of a buzz cut before you realize what she’s doing. That is called the Land of No Return. You don’t want to visit, and you certainly don’t want to buy a condo there unless you’re emotionally prepared.

2. It’s all about trust. I have had many, many terrible hair cuts and when you have short hair, there’s no hiding it. I mean, I suppose there are hats but how long can you really wear them without raising suspicion? I wouldn’t recommend going really short until you’ve found a stylist who you really mesh with.

3. Failing trust, it’s all about patience. If my current cut isn’t working my default reaction is “take it shorter!” Not only will that not solve some hair problems, it makes them worse. Waiting it out can be the best thing you can do for yourself, even if its frustrating because another 1/4″ of hair makes my cut do something entirely different!

4. Failing patience, it’s all about colour. My new motto is that when I’m bored with my hair, I will dye it rather than cut it. There’s just less room for heart ache.

My biggest hair frustration is often not having a good idea of what would work best on me. Even with really short hair, there are so many different ways you can go!

Do you let your hair stylist lead, or do you call the shots?

I would love to know what an actual stylist prefers. I tend to bring in pictures of what kind of a look I’m thinking about, and then let them do their thing from there. What do you do?

Every now and then when I least expect it, it’ll show up. That little negative voice in the back of my mind that’s full of criticism. It used to be a really big part of my life when I was younger, I was convinced that everything I did spelled out one word: awkward. And I was so uncomfortable in my own skin that I’m sure I wasn’t that far off.

Lately I’ve been noticing that little voice coming back. If I get a haircut and it doesn’t turn out right I can’t shake the idea that “I don’t look feminine enough anymore”, or I’ll put my goals and dreams on the back burner in favour of catching up with everyone I can because I hear that little voice telling me that “good friends never say no”.

I’ve always tried to choose which kinds of thoughts I pay attention to. In my experience if you feed the good ones and ignore the bad ones, you can be in for a quality of life shift but lately my ability to ignore the bad ones and focus on the good has been slipping.

So I’m making a change.

This week I’m starting a big effort to be extra positive and stop buying into what that little voice has to say. If I’m awkward at times, I want to love that part of me as much as I love the witty and cute parts. If things are hard, why do I think it’s more valid to beat myself up than it is to be encouraging? I need to be my biggest cheerleader, because if I won’t get behind me, who will?

Sometimes I wonder what our lives would look like if we changed the stories we tell ourselves about who we are.

Are there any stories you tell yourself  that aren’t helping you be who you want to be?

ps – The lovely Amy from Just a Titch interviewed me today about leaving the entertainment industry last year, being confident & how to start over, you can find it here!