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Thank you for all of the kind comments yesterday! Day One of house painting took place with minimal disruption but the neighbors ended up telling the painters the reason they’re so upset – they think our house is covered in lead paint.
As further proof of their insanity continues to emerge I’ll keep you posted.
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As promised, the crazy Wedding DIY Marathon Begins!!
So without further adieu, could we talk about breasts? I have never been one of those girls who is overflowing with boobs. It’s hard to overflow with any thing when you’re an A Cup. After torturing myself with insecurity from grade six to grade nine I became resigned to my fate. Puberty rolled the dice with me and, I came up short.
“I’m just streamlined!” I thought. And for the most part I stopped torturing myself. And after a while I even stopped buying the bras with 4″ of padding in them. Because I already had a 5 year supply.
But in shopping for a wedding dress I had to really think hard about what was going to be flattering for my body shape… it was like I was getting ready for prom. I consulted The Oracles of The Knot, Wedding Bells, and Offbeat Bride. What would work?! Would I have to wear a sheath style dress? Really? Is that all anyone had to offer?
I ended up buying and A-Line style dress, I tried it on, fell in love and bought it on the spot. And then last week I was looking at the pictures of myself in the dress at the shop and all I could think was “Um…I look a little….pointy. In the breast.”
Let me show you.
Check out the line the hard line that runs straight across the boob area.
That’s all dress superstructure.
My head is omitted because somehow this then doesn’t count as the
internet seeing me in my wedding dress pre-wedding.
Photoshop to your hearts content.
How did I miss this?? I must have been drunk from the estrogren that flooded my system after I tried on the first dress with a corset back – but somehow I completely blocked out how the top of the dress looked. I tried it on again. It’s official, the whole top of the dress is a victim of over zealous bodice wiring and I don’t have the boobs to re-structure the dress on my own!
Exhibit A: The Wires At Rest
My wedding dress was a bargain, but even working in a theatre I don’t think our wardrobe department could reign in the wires in the front of the dress without me throwing a couple hundred dollars at them.
I’ve been tearing my hair out about it a little, and trying to figure out what I could do. I’ve already bought a bra that will work with the dress….but maybe another undergarment would help? I started looking into it, but nothing seemed like it would help. Even after I had the bust area taken in a little it still…..had it’s own scaffolding system set up.
I was at the fabric store last week and I started poking around looking for a glue gun when I realized that I was in the “build a bra” section of the store. Only the bras were all made of….some sort of flimsy cheesecloth looking material with terrifying seams Frankensteined all over them.
But to my right were the shoulder pads.
I had a terribly embarrassing thought. What if I gave my dress a boob job?
Immediately I felt like I was buying cigarettes when I was 17 years old – what would I say if she questioned me?! Do I look like someone who could be buying shoulder pads for personal use? But….what will my pictures look like if I don’t buy them? I grabbed them, bought them and walked out.
I hand stitched them in, and pulled the dress on. They work perfectly!! They’re thin so they don’t actually work as boob enhancers, but they do have enough structure to counter the wiring in the front of the bodice and they help the material sit properly when the dress is on. They don’t make me look out of proportion, just like the dress isn’t pulling away from its super structure.
The finished product
All I can say is that I will really enjoy any comments I get about how good my boobs look now, and I’m glad that now I’m not the only one who will look at my pictures in a whole new way!
Crafting 101: The Boob Job. A Cups of the world, put down the sheath style dresses. I’m starting a revolution.
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
Your dress is stunning and I think you would’ve looked beautiful in it pre-boob-job. But now that you’re happy in it? And you’re not going to worry? You’ll walk tall and look that much more gorgeous! Yay!!!
PS – I’d much rather be thin and lacking in the boob department than full figured with boobs bouncing all over the place. The grass is always greener…
OH MY GOD KYLA. I LOVE this post. As a fellow A-cupper, I know I will have a similar experience when trying on dresses. Uy.
It took me a long time (waaaaay past 9th grade – more like post-college) to embrace my smaller-sized rack, but now I am totally happy with it. It really makes life easier in so many ways, and my bf is perfectly content. And I feel like when my boobs do grow again (during pregnancy) it will be delightful in a way that bigger-chested women can’t appreciate.
Anyway, your resourcefulness is amazing. I LOVE that you gave your dress a boob job. Nicely done! We need to see a headless pic of you in your newly augmented dress!
LOVE the dress! My seamstress sewed cups into my dress to solve this very issue. Then, I didn’t need to wear very uncomfortable longline bra!! Yay, for “boob jobs”!
You are positively brilliant. I am envious of you ingenuity!
Ah, I’ve been there. As a bridesmaid only, of course. I have invested in the “chicken breasts,” that you put inside your bra to give you more cleavage ($28 at victoria’s secret) to help out the lowercut dresses. I have also had to wear two, yes, that’s right TWO strapless bras to two weddings I was in due to the same problem. Talk about uncomfortable.
Admittedly I’ve never thought about shoulder pads before. Smart thinking.
Love the dress. Look forward to wedding pictures!
Thankfully, it seems like you’ve been able to keep a somewhat level head about this little bump. I’m sure there are MANY brides out there who would have a complete physical and mental breakdown, resulting in…well, something bad.
And yeah, I actually followed your links and spent about an hour browsing wedding photos of complete strangers. {shakes it off} my boyfriend would be super freaked out.
You are so clever! Can’t wait to see more wedding day crafts. :)
You are so smart! What a genius idea. the dress is beautiful. I’m going to have the opposite problem, I have a a huge rib cage and am pretty busty, so I will need to find a dress that doesn’t make me look so big up top.
I had those in my prom dress in high school. They seamstress fit me and said she was going to add them in so I didn’t have to wear a bra. It worked!
Good thinking 99! Although I thought it looked fine pre boob job anyway, it just looked like that was how the dress was meant to be but maybe I’m missing something? Either way, it’s a very nice dress and I just love the colour of your hair. I’ve always wanted to be a redhead (I was for a few months but it was too expensive and could never get the right colour mix). You’re going to look great! I love Offbeat Bride, such a cool site.
Totally not where I thought you were going with this….hahaha. I thought for sure you were going to stuff your bra with shoulder pads and I would have been completely ok with that. I still encourage it.
You, miss, are a genius! I loved this post. Like you, i’m lacking the chest area. They just don’t want to grow and i’ve learned to be okay with that. I actually like them. ANyway, I love how you used shoulder pads to help the dress. It’s brilliant and I want you on speed dial when i’m preparing for my (way in the future) wedding.
I LOVE YOU!! HAHAHA shoulderpads!! Does Jesse know you did this?! :)
i had a similar problem with my wedding dress, but not being so good at the whole sewing/hand-stitching thing, i went for the ‘chicken cutlets’ from victoria’s secret.
You bought the SHOULDER PADS while I was IN THE STORE and you DIDN’T TELL ME? That’s FAR too sneaky
Ha, I love the title! Too funny. You are so creative and skilled. I have the creativity but lack the skill. So I would have had my boob job all caddywampus! Pretty, pretty dress!!
Oooo, GORGEOUS dress! And what DIY talent you have my dear :)
Wow you are super crafty! Way to go giving yourself a boob job :) That is so clever.
I waited to get home last night to see this entry bc I can’t see the pics at work – and the freakin’ internet is out!! Will save for later… !
This is awesome. When I was younger, before I’d really developed, I always thought shoulder pads would be the perfect bra stuffers (though I never actually tried it). It makes me oddly happy to see my idea being put to use with a twist.
You are a genius. I, too, lack much substance in the chesty region, and my wedding dress (also an A-line) needed a little something to “fill it out” for me. But I’m not exactly the crafty type (except the part where I made my bridesmaids’ necklaces — but that’s so impractical), so I paid the dress shop to insert pretty much EXACTLY what you did for yourself. And mine cost like fiddy extra bucks.
PS – I love your blog.
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