The Other Woman

by Kyla Roma on August 22, 2008

in Me & My Mister

She moved in with us yesterday…

She has some ‘ideas’ about making a wife out of me.

It’s like having a new baby in the house, I immediately took the dress to its ‘area’ and got it set up on the chair just like the saleswoman said I should….and then I had to post pictures of the dress to weddingplans asking the internet to help me put the train in the right position in relation to the chair so that it wouldn’t wrinkle up and turn into a prom dress because I’ve offended it.

I can see it now, coming home after work and the dress is halfway in the washing machine with blue and red dye all over the top of the maching shouting “You can’t stop me!! Only the leather jackets understand me!! I’ll dye myself purple and cut my train off it I want to!!! I’m not a child anymore!!” And I can’t reason with that kind of confrontation!

Last night was the tasting dinner for our reception and I was floored – I gorged on red lentil ravioli, pino noir, butternut squash soup, and an assortment of appetizers that were out of this world. I will break the back of my dress eating dinner, and frankly I don’t care! The meal was wonderful, sitting at the chefs table in the glow of the flames licking up the sides frying pans my mom and dad, fiance and I were in heaven.

My mom came back to our house after dinner to check out something about the dress….and told me that she and my step dad are getting divorced. It’s not a surprise, but it is really sad and it means that five out of five of the marriages in my immediate family have officially ended in divorce. I’m extremely proud of my mom for getting out of a non-functioning relationship, and I’m happy to call my step dad my friend, but talk about odd timing. I guess that’s how relationships work.

I’m going to take the whole five out of five thing as a Field Guide On How Not To Be In A Relationship, and a trend I’m going to buck, but I definitely feel like I’m in new territory with this whole marriage thing. At least there are no divorces (at all! Who are these people?) in fiance’s family – he has assured me that I’m seriously stuck with him.

I’m really going to have to have some words with the dress. Maybe she has some advice for me.

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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Lauren August 22, 2008 at 11:50 am

Your dress is so pretty!! I Love how you compared it to another person. I really do think wedding dresses have their own personality. And around them you have to act a certain wait. More grown up, more posh. Pshh, like all angry teenagers, she’ll learn that you’re boss!

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2 laylou August 22, 2008 at 1:20 pm

The dress looks gorgeous!

I’m sure you’ll be more than fine in your marriage. You seem to have your head on your shoulders and from what I’ve read about the two of you, it’ll be good. A 7 time bridesmaid ought to know =)

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3 Jamie August 22, 2008 at 1:44 pm

I can’t wait to see more pictures of it! Your menu sounds amazing.

I want to get married. I’m so happy and jealous of all the engaged bloggers! Seriously, so excited for you!

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4 lyla lou August 22, 2008 at 2:50 pm

Wow, I got a shiver up my spine seeing that dress! it’s so beautiful! I’ve never been married or even close but I can imagine having the dress in the house and seeing it hung up like that would be an odd feeling. Odd in a good way of course=)

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5 apricot tea. August 22, 2008 at 11:21 pm

What a pretty dress. :] You’ll have so much fun being a wife. I know that I’ve been having a blast. There’s nothing to it, really.

I have to say, though, that I am jealous that you able to wear an actual wedding dress. I wasn’t able to since we eloped. ;/

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6 letigreinfrance August 23, 2008 at 7:10 am

Dress looks great, obviously we can’t wait to see photos of you in it on the day!

Sorry to hear about your mother and stepfather…at the very least though I guess we can learn from other people’s mistakes sometimes? All of Christophe’s friends seem to be breaking up and getting divorced, his friends are in the 40s age bracket. It’s pretty sad…

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7 Stephanie August 24, 2008 at 1:09 pm

Pretty dress!! I’m super jealous. =)

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8 brandy August 24, 2008 at 5:19 pm

Pretty dress! I had no idea that they had to be stored like that, although it makes complete sense. As for your mom, the timing is the thing I though of too, but it sounds like she has great people around her (like you!) and that she’s doing the right thing for herself. Now I need to go make a snack- your food references have left me hungry!

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9 Alexis August 24, 2008 at 10:22 pm

Ooh…pretty dress!

My parents were able to get help via counseling and another program to help them bounce back from the brink of divorce. I’m really proud of them for working it out, but I know not all couples can do that. I just hope that I’m able to take what I’ve watched them do and learn from it. Which is totally out there for my boyfriend, as he hasn’t been witness to many couples with problems…freaks.

Your mom sounds like a classy lady, that’s a tough decision to make and it seems she’s handling it gracefully!

:)

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10 jessica maria August 25, 2008 at 2:17 pm

I always get scared when I hear about divorce rates, but am confident about my fiancee and I. We’ve promised each other that nothing is insurmountable in the relationship. Our families’ track records are varied (his are divorced, mine are together…) but he, like you, feels like he learned what not to do as well – and what he aspires to have in our own marriage. :)

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11 Nilsa August 26, 2008 at 11:04 am

Big bummer about your mom. But, it seems like you know it’s for the best. Isn’t a happy mom more important than a married one? Maybe this time around, she can take some pointers from you. :-)

BTW, the dress? GORGEOUS!

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12 Jenny August 26, 2008 at 11:45 am

oh my goodness, i almost busted a seam laughing at your dress’s personification. do you follow any superstition about letting the fiance see the dress pre-ceremony?

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